Serpentus Saragossii

Poor little Wilton! He was dying of a terrible disease, but his heartless Aunt Hilda refused to allow him any peace. If he tried to make his favorite ham and cheddar sandwich, she chided him endlessly for using too much mayonnaise. If he walked across the living room, she demanded that he walk about the edge of the cloth rug because she wanted to keep it clean. If he dropped one speck of melted butter on the tablecloth while eating his warm biscuit with wild cherry marmalade, she chased him away from the table. Upon discovering his secret pet turtle, she killed it by throwing it against a tree. Then, one day, little Wilton decided to do something about his tormentor.