Changeable: How Collaborative Problem Solving Changes Lives at Home, at School, and at Work

As featured on The Mel Robbins Show—discover the surprising science of helping anyone change

Whether as a parent, a boss, a romantic partner, or on your own journey toward personal growth, you know how hard it is to change problem behavior. Conventional methods like willpower, punishment, and strict discipline often backfire, creating a downward spiral of resentment and frustration, while the problem goes unsolved.

But what if the thinking behind “tough love” is wrong? What if people don’t misbehave because they want to, but because they lack the skills to do better? Or as renowned psychologist J. Stuart Ablon asks, what if changing problem behavior is a matter of skill, not will?

Based on more than twenty-five years of clinical work with at-risk teens as well as training parents, teachers, counselors and law enforcement, and supported by research in the neuroscience of conflict resolution, Changeable presents an empowering new way of thinking about changing unwanted behavior—Collaborative Problem Solving—that builds empathy and connection, helps others reach their full potential, and actually gets results.

Presenting remarkable success stories and actionable insights, Changeable gives parents, educators, managers, and change-makers of all stripes a simple roadmap for helping people grow.