When I mentioned to my friends my desire to own a female robot, I got the most peculiar responses from them. Firstly, their eyes would light up from the shock. Then they whinnied like a horse laughing. And would slowly back away from me regarding me suspiciously as they did so.

A man like me must be careful when he enters old age because people treat you like an imbecile who’s trying to relive his youth by having the audacity to let ideas wander around aimlessly in his head. To some people, old age is frowned upon as a disability.

When the day came for me to decide to purchase the robot online, people send my wife wouldn’t allow me to have such a toy. She gave me a lecture on how retired people should act and bringing a female robot into her house was not the act of a sane old fart. “I forbid you having such idle nonsense.”

I pressed down hard on the “order now” button and awaited the outcome…