Mooses with Bazookas: And Other Stories Children Should Never Read is a fun collection of stories. It’s exactly like The Count of Monte Cristo apart from the many differences. Our lawyers have instructed us to warn you that reading it may directly cause you to come down with every single disease you are worried about contracting. On the plus side, our nation’s beloved and heroic critics have had their say.

“FANTASTIC is not a word that comes to mind.”

—Beth Hinkle, author of Elite Prose

“ASTOUNDING problems at the sentence level and beyond.”

—Dr. Roger Johns, Ph. D.

“S. D. SMITH IS in dire need of A GENIUS editor.”

—Art Simonson, Inner Ring Magazine

“This author had nothing MUCH BETTER to do THAN destroy the language of DICKENS, SHAKESPEARE, AUSTEN!”

—Yammy Tork, Good Lit Guild

S. D. Smith has been called “America’s aft-most wordsmith” and is the award-losing author of more than ten books and less than thirty-seven books. He is half-man, half-rabbit, and half-mathematician. He lives in West Virginia with his wife and four children, because it would be kinda weird to live with some other family and super weird not to live in West Virginia.