Anal sex: it’s all I could think about. I’d post photos on websites daily of me trying out new toys, but I was a faker. I’d never once had the real thing inside there and I think it’s about time that I corrected that.

I’ve been speaking to a guy who seems nice enough to be my first, but I can’t believe it when we meet up and I discover his real identity. I didn’t come this far to not go through with it, even if it’s my best friend’s Dad! What do you say, Mr. Parker? Want to be the first guy in there?